                      A brief introduction
                      --------------------

 Welcome to "Grandson of Wowbagger",  a third-generation  program 
which  is  probably  the  most  tasteless  and  insulting  little 
accessory you're likely ever to have other people - or yourself - 
stumble across.

 The  accessory's  full  name  is  "The  Automated  Grandson   of 
Wowbagger Still the Infinitely Prolonged", named after the rather 
infamous  character  featured  in the first  chapter  of  Douglas 
Adams'   hilariously   funny  book  "Life,   the   Universe   and 
Everything".
 For  those  who  don't  know:   After  some  problems  involving 
something elastic and time travelling, Wowbagger became immortal. 
He  thought this was rather nice,  but as time progressed he  got 
kinda fed up with everything. So he set out to insult every being 
in the entire universe, in alphabetic order.
 So there. This is automated version of this immortal being - or, 
rather, as this is already the sixth (and now most definitely the 
last   and  certainly  the  best)  version  of  this   particular 
accessory, the Grandson Of.
 Wowbagger  himself,  as well as any of his  offspring,  can  now 
retire.

                     Public Domain products
                     ----------------------

 The  products mentioned in this bit,  just like the  product  to 
which this documentation file belongs to,  are freeware, i.e. you 
can  copy  them freely and you don't have to pay for  using  them 
unless you really feel you want to (which would be nice).

- The Background Music Utility (BMU)
  Working  on the ST can be tedious.  Wouldn't it be nice if  you  
  had  one  of about 50 different pieces of nice  music  sedately  
  running  in  the  background,  using the  ST's  built-in  sound  
  routines (which' capacity you should not underestimate)?   Then 
  this accessory is perfect for you.
- Speedwriter II
  A somewhat older 'interactive animated correspondence' utility,  
  including its GfA Basic 2.0 source.  With this,  it is possible  
  to send remarkable letters that you can see being typed as  you 
  look, including all cursor movements. Just a nice titbit.
- Handy
  A tiny accessory that allows you to do three things: Access the  
  file  selector (handy when using one like "UIS  III"),  Specify  
  date & time, and freeze the system until a password is entered.  
  A source is included so that you can easily adapt the password,  
  and then compile it again (using GfA Basic 3.x).
- Name Creator
  Although  this program will only appeal to those  into  reading  
  and  writing fantasy fiction,  this utility will be  useful  to  
  those  who  generally  need to think up fantasy  names  in  the  
  category of dwarves,  elves,  etc. Using a database of existing  
  parts of names (taken from  Donaldson,  Tolkien,  Weis/Hickman,  
  McCaffrey and Herbert, among others), you will be amazed at the  
  quality  of the many thousands of different names this  program  
  can come up with.  Creating anagrams is also possible -  though  
  doing  this  with large names will use  LOTS  of  memory.  This  
  program  is  being used professionally by a games  company  for  
  their role playing games.  Word parts can be added,  a  history  
  can be kept, etc...

                      The Wowbagger Manual
                      --------------------

 Simply  copy  the WOWBAGGR.ACC file into the root  directory  of 
your boot drive.  In case you do not have a hard disk,  this will 
be A, and in case you DO have a harddisk this will most likely be 
C.  After booting your system, the Grandson of Wowbagger will lie 
lurking in the background, invisible to the world.
 Until it hits, that is.
 This  accessory is slightly 'illegal' (in the  definition  Atari 
gives to the word, that is) - it does not occupy a desk accessory 
slot in the 'Desk' pull-down menu.  This represents no  problems. 
It even works together with the "Chameleon" accessory loader.
 Even though "Grandson of Wowbagger" occupies no accessory  slot, 
this  does  not  mean  you  can  suddenly  have  more  than   six 
accessories  installed! This limit still remains (at  least  with 
non-"MultiTOS" Operating Systems).
 AT  ALL  TIMES you should make sure the WOWBAGGR.CNF is  in  the 
same  directory  as  the actual program.  When  using  it  as  an 
accessory,  make sure that the configuration file is in the  root 
directory,  even when the accessory is somewhere else (like in  a 
"C:\ACCS\"  folder).  Before you use it as an accessory  for  the 
first time, always check if the settings are to your liking.

 CONFIGURATION MODE

 "WOWBAGGR.ACC" can be renamed to "WOWBAGGR.PRG".  If you execute 
the  program  then,   with  the configuration file  in  the  same 
directory,  you will enter the built-in editor,   which can  edit 
the relevant accessory parameters which are the following:

 INSULT INTERVAL IN MINUTES AND SECONDS (1 to 60 minutes)
  Sets the intervals at which curses will be flung on the  screen 
  and/or printer, with an accuracy of 1 second.
 OUTPUT TO PRINTER/SCREEN/BOTH
  Determines  whether  curses  should appear  on  a  printer  (if 
  connected), screen, or both.
 NUMBER OF INSULTS PER ACTIVATION (1-5)
  Specifies  the amount of curses that will be put on the  screen 
  in one fell swoop.
 CURSE RATING (U, PGA or XXX)
  Internally the words have been rated somewhat.  "U" (Universal) 
  is pretty harmless but insulting nonetheless.  "PGA"  (Parental 
  Guidance  Advised) is already pretty raunchy and "XXX"  (Triple 
  X  Rated) contains all the words after which your parents  told 
  you  to wash your mouth (or even more  drastic  things).  These 
  include blatantly sexist and counter-religious words, and a lot 
  worse.
 LANGUAGE (English or Dutch)
  There are many more English than Dutch curses,  but it might be 
  fun to see a few Dutch curses.  To Dutch people (or people from 
  Belgium,  or  even  South  Africa) they  might  actually  prove 
  useful. It should be noted that only the actual curse mode will 
  be fully in Dutch when selected.  Configuration mode is  always 
  in English.

 By  default,   screen  and  printer output are  enabled  (if  no 
printer is connected or on-line this will be no problem) and  the 
insult  time  is  set to five minutes (quantity  is  set  to  5).  
Default  curse  rating  is "U" and default language  is  English.  
You  can  imagine what fun it would  be to put the  accessory  on 
someone's   boot   disk/partition  with  a high  time  limit  and 
printer  output  only.   He  will  never notice it until  he  has 
turned  on  his  printer  and  is,  for  example,  printing   out 
something.   "Grandson  of  Wowbagger"  can  interrupt  any   GEM 
application as well as any printing going on at the  moment,  and 
will  spill  the insult (for example in the middle  printing   an 
official  document...limitless  loadsa  hard-core  fun!)  without 
mercy.
 When  entering  configuration mode,  the "SAVE" button  will  be 
default.  Once  you have saved your settings,  the "EXIT"  button 
will be default.  At all times you can alternatively press [UNDO] 
to exit or [HELP] for the "About" dialog.
 Once  the  parameters have been edited,  all you need to  do  is 
rename  the file to something ending in ".ACC" and make sure  the 
configuration  file ("WOWBAGGR.CNF") in the  same  directory.  It 
should  be noted that this configuration file is  NOT  compatible 
with that of earlier versions of the program.

 IN CASE OF AN EMERGENCY

 Should you ever yourself be surprised by a sudden appearance  of 
swearing words on your monitor (whether because you  accidentally 
left  it on yourself or because some evil person put it  on  your 
boot  partition),  there  is a way out.  Simply leave  the  curse 
screen whilst keeping the [ALTERNATE] key pressed.
 No  further  insults will appear on screen and/or printer  -  at 
least not until you boot again.

 PUBLIC HEALTH WARNING

 There are some really nasty insults possible with this program -
as a matter of fact,  of all the literally millions and  millions 
of possible insults only a couple are somewhat mild in one way or 
another.  So  nobody  under 18 should use it,  unless  they  have 
really liberal parents.
 I have included some really gross words,  so beware! Don't write 
to me and say I haven't warned you.
 If  it  comforts you to know that I was pissed out of  my  skull 
during the creation of this program: I was berzerkedly drunk when 
I  created most of it.  Also see the note at the very end of  the 
manual.
 Oh  yeah.  Nearly forgot.  A total of  2,056,732,555,440 (that's 
over 2 TRILLION!!) curses are possible.  Even if you  install the 
accessory's  parameters   to  5 curses to  be  displayed  at  the 
smallest  interval  - one minute - it will take  you   well  over 
775,000  years  of non-stop computing to  see  them   all  (given  
that  no  insults appear twice,  which is quite unlikely  not  to 
happen).
 That's quite a long time.

 THE THEORY

 Well,  there isn't much to say really. Basically it has a couple 
of long lists of words. One contains only adverbs (very, grossly, 
insubordinately,  etc.), another one only adjectives (big, small, 
putrid) which is followed by nouns (git, twat, horse). Some nouns 
(I believe they're called non-count nouns or mass nouns) can have 
something  like  "load of" in front of them - so there's  also  a 
list of words along that line (bag full of, toilet full of). This 
latter category also has an extra adjective added (say, "bag full 
of RANCID milk").
 And that,  basically,  is all there is to it.  It is based on an 
original  idea  by  Stefan Posthuma  and  Dave  Bloemendaal,  but 
"Wowbagger"  is  much more naughty and doesn't  limit  things  to 
Dutch.

 OTHER VERSIONS

 Quite an enormous while ago,  somewhere in 1989 methinks, I made 
the first version of "Wowbagger" for the disk magazine "ST NEWS". 
It  has been spread reasonably effectively.  The difference  with 
the later versions was that the number of insults per  activation 
could  not be changed and that about 1.5 BILLION  swearing  words 
could  be generated with it.  In this version I used  the  second 
part of a swearing word (the adjective) twice.  So you would  get 
"very RANCID PUTRID sissy" or something like that.
 As  of the second version,  the middle bit was only  used  once. 
This reduced the amount of curses possible, but on the other hand 
I  had added about twice as many words so the fun was  more  than 
doubled. And, of course, You could press "Help" while a curse was 
on  screen to get some credits.  This second version  was  called 
"Version Integrale" and was done on July 14th 1991.
 The  third  version  was  called  "Son  of  Wowbagger"  and  was 
basically  a  revamp of the second version.  The editor  was  now 
built in (an external program did it before),  the accessory  was 
now compressed, and quite a lot of words had been added again. It 
was released on February 24th 1993.  A slight rehash,  the  Final 
Son,  was  done  on  March 17th 1993 (it could  create  about  30 
million additional swearing words).  The version number was  then 
3.01.
 The  fifth  version,  at  the time proclaimed to  be  the  FINAL 
version (3.5) was released on May 25th 1993.  It had yet  another 
enormous  amount of words added,  totalling to a possible half  a 
billion different curses. I genuinely intended it to be the final 
version, but...
 Now,  finally,  we have reached the sixth version (version 4.2). 
Nothing  about it is proclaimed to be final,  though chances  are 
substantially bigger that it might very well be.  Of course a lot 
of  words  have been added,  but more things  have  changed.  For 
starters  it  now uses a GEM-compatible  interface  (courtesy  of 
Gregor  Duchalski's  "FlyDials")  and  has  some  added  switches 
("English/Dutch"  and "U/PGA/XXX" curse filth  ratings).  Between 
the "x full of" and the noun there is now an adjective  too.  The 
boot  problem present up to and including the fifth  version  was 
also fixed, and it is now even compatible with "MultiTOS" as well 
as  "Geneva".  I'd  like to use these last  enhancements  as  the 
reason  behind  actually making this sixth version in  the  first 
place.
 It's not as if I was actually having fun or anything.

 LITERATURE

 Well, I am actually slightly proud to say that none of the words 
used are fictitious - even though many may very much seem  so.  I 
used   a  standard  dictionary,   a  special   "Superior   People 
Dictionary" by Peter Bowler,  and the help of some song lyrics as 
well as,  in the earliest version,  the invaluable assistance  of 
Tim  and Dave of The Lost Boys.  The gross words are  either  off 
Dave  or  off Carcass' "Symphonies of Sickness"  CD  lyrics.  The 
third  version also incorporated a lot of new words from  various 
dictionaries   (most   notably  amongst  which  is   "Slang   and 
Euphemisms"  by Richard Spears) as well as quite a lot  of  words 
heard  on the BBC series "Red Dwarf".  Further versions had  more 
"Red Dwarf" bits added, primarily.
 The Dutch part of version 4.2 was based on the original  program 
written  in  1987 by Stefan Posthuma and  Dave  Bloemendaal  with 
strange  word  assistance by Jordy.  A lot of  Dutch  words  have 
afterwards   been  added,   inspired  by  Eric  Schreurs'   "Joop 
Klepzeiker" and "Geharrebar".

                           The Address
                           -----------

 I can be reached at the following address.  There,  I would like 
to  receive  possible  donations too (given the  fact  that  this 
particular  accessory  guarentees  at  least  775,000  years   of 
entertainment, I should think that's worth something)!

 Richard Karsmakers
 P.O. Box 67
 NL-3500 AB  Utrecht
 The Netherlands
 Email: r.c.karsmakers@stud.let.ruu.nl

 PLEASE NOTE THAT THE ADDRESS IN THE PROGRAM IS NO LONGER VALID!

 It should be noted that the email address may not be valid after 
the summer of 1996.
 The  program on this disk and its manual are copyright  1994  by 
Richard  Karsmakers.  However,  you may copy them as much as  you 
want  as  long as the package remains complete  (i.e.  program  + 
document file + other associated files).
 Death to The Men With Suits!
 By the way,  I was quite sober when I made the program.  I think 
this kind of thing should be possible in this day and age. If not 
for anything else, I made this program to make a statement.
 I just wish to have you know that.

                       Utrecht, the Netherlands, August 14th 1994
